Trains/hospitals & walking poles !

Well I have to say I am totally humbled by the response the messages, phone calls, tweets , sharing posts , kind words , words of wisdom , threats to kill if I mention certain things 😜… fucking hell really feel so lucky it’s a huge step opening up your life to the public … I’ve deliberated for a long time but feel it’s right to share the fun times along with the sad times …. people may think my life is one big adventure … at the moment it is and that’s because it could all stop in a blink of a eye…..I feel like a swan sometimes swimming gracefully but kicking like hell underneath .

Now I have two sayings use a lot .. never make a plan (it always changes !) and fuck/love my life .. daughters consultants appointment in Birmingham Children’s hospital (in education still so under children’s) and she has the most wonderful paediatric Consultant she will move over to adults when finished education . It’s always a long day.. early train ..traipse through the Bull Ring to Childrens Hospital other side of City it’s interesting as we walk through streets where the Crown Courts are … always something going on ! .. it’s a harrowing day in some respects as it’s such a sad place to be …so many sick children and I always think although she has liver disease she’s so lucky that it is controlled by medication … horrible for her to take a concoction of tablets every night . She says she rattles ! . Appointment is three fold .. she is called to have blood pressure taken, weight & height recorded and then to sit in another waiting area .. she sees Consultant on her own initially with a transition nurse ( who will help her when changing from children to adult hospital ) I keep saying it but her Consultant ( in Paediatric Hepatology) is a remarkable person .. when daughter was rushed into Birmingham children’s hospital following 24 hrs in our local hospital in isolation as they didn’t know what was wrong with her ..& eventually she was transferred with papers that read (much to my absolute horror) question mark liver failure …..

It was a very very stressful time the liver ward is full of very very sick children … it was all a bit surreal I have to say the teams that put their life and soul into working in these environments need recognition they are an extremely dedicated group of professionals who are also kind, friendly & funny ! So each time we go back I relive it all as does daughter …I am sure but high five for NHS as between us it’s invaluable … so the last thing she needed was us jumping on wrong train 😫…hearing the conductor saying next stop Milton Keynes …. fuckity fuck now what … she was not impressed eventually found the funny side of it … we sat for an hour on train and then jumped off and back on a train back to Birmingham .. quick email to Consultants secretary to inform we would be late … end of it all we actually only 30mins late … successful appointment blood results best they have been for ages .. am very very proud of how she handles it all .. takes it all in her stride❤️

The day didn’t get any better we had picked her up from school myddelton collegethat morning ( she boards ) and were taking her back after getting off train … Mr Lover Lover picked us up we all talking so much we forgot to drop her back at school and we’re half way home until she piped up bloody hell this is taking ages ….. fuckkkkk …about turn .. was glad to get home but we did have lots of laughter as usual !

I have to get out in the fresh air and walk every day sometimes twice a day .. some short walks some long ones but all I love even thou I do moan about hills .. a lot I hate them .. I walk when stressed or need to think things through find it great for clearing head but at times it doesn’t always go according to plan …….

We walk a lot Mr Lover Lover loves hills I do not ..simple easy peasy .. however every walk we go on there are hills and lots of them one of the downsides to living in North Wales .. I am bloody sure there are flat walks we can do but no ( I am sure he thinks it’s funny to see me almost needing oxygen , wanting a Sherpa and constantly saying fuck sake I hate hills .. I am too hot … fuck sake I am almost hyperthermic ) he laughs at me a lot and I laugh at myself a lot too …. sidetracking … I have said before I have a short fuse at times … daughter day one in new school we had taken her in the morning dropped her and about 7 cases off and headed to hairdressers .. now I am not one for sitting in hair salons I struggle to keep still … I try to eeek it out 7ish weeks … gone almost blonde as can’t stand seeing the badger grey seeping through when hair is natural colour … so it’s a treat basically my hair actually looks nice for one day or this particular day a couple of hours … now gals I am sure you can relate to this next part of the story … Mr Lover Lover who walks every day twice a day and loves the air, mud, rain, wind infact anything extreme ( ex military you see … I am not !) so he’s pacing round kitchen and I know what’s coming… right ready to walk the dogs .. he’s kitting up .. it’s raining .. it’s cold .. it’s shit … I am stressing over daughter .. stressing over son as he was flying back from Vietnam to Oz with the most basic budget airline I’d never heard of and of course he was going to fall out of the sky …I mutter some fuck words and chuck kit on … we are going up to a lake where there are numerous paths and actually you can drive up there ( sensible !) typically we are going up the hardest route I kid you not it’s like climbing Everest I swear … knowing this I grab my walking pole .. now I am not old but with no feeling in the top of my right arm(due to lymph node removal) my balance isn’t that great so a pole if it’s steep helps bit like a hand rail !! So off we trot .. yeah it’s a trot he has long strides I am a short arse so I seem to trot behind huffing and puffing putting 10 times more effort it seems … it’s raining my hair is fucked already, daughter phones says new school is like a prison(must add this feeling had disappeared by next day !) and wants to come home .. son not been active for 14 hrs on Facebook .. I can feel the stress surging through me … stomping up this steep,rocky, boggy path he’s trying to talk sense to me about kids but I’m just about to loose it .. big time …really pissed off about my hair £££ and I now look like I’ve just got out of shower .. I loose concentration for a moment and boom step into the biggest pool of bog up to my shins over my boots .. it was a real Dawn French moment … what does he do ?? Help ? Say oh god are you alright ? Let me help you ? NO HE LAUGHS… A LOT … boom standby ….I launch my walking pole so hard it wraps itself round a tree and bends with a string of explicit words I can not bear to type let alone to think I said them … he retrieves the bent pole and thankfully carries it .. meanwhile I have stomped off ( its flat ish now !!) so I can get some speed up … tears falling down face … fuck my life .. fuck my life … we in middle of nowhere I am sobbing not speaking to Mr Lover Lover and I hear bloody hell Jen how are you … Christ wipe face look pleased to see said person chat about kids and crap for 10 mins and carry on .. why is it you always see someone when you least want too ! Walked back down in silence checking my phone continuously no bloody 4G… have got son on flight tracker . … intermittent signal couple of messages of woe from daughter … say the usual stuff to her it will all be just fine promise , you need a few days adjustment all will be hunky dory … get home piss wet though, cross, completely worn out mentally & physically but high five back to wifi … the boys plane has landed without a hitch and he’s back in Melbourne met up with his mate and is waiting for a bus to Victoria … that’s him sorted .

I am not entirely sure if my short fuse is gradually getting worse due to hormones or the block on hormones or the ongoing treatment or just because I am nearing 50 shouldn’t this mean I am more mellow man ? Seems not …never mind I feel a retail mission coming on .. I need ( want, have to have ) new walking trousers how exciting huh .. I spend most of my time in jeans , hoodie/ fleece and outdoor gear … I have three pairs of walking boots … one salomon approx 18 yrs old my fave a second hand pair of brasher boots which I love dearly had them about 8 years and a newish pair of Scarpa boots which I detest they are horrible I hate them … and the wellies of course wellies .. hunters all the way love Le Chemeau but they don’t fit me very well …thankfully thou as they cost a bomb.

I also swear by Paramo Velez overhead waterproof/windproof jackets SR Cunninghams I love them they are warm and you don’t need to wear tons of layers under them just one or two base layers depending on how cold it is .. they last forever, they wash ( in special wash in stuff ) tumble dry, worth every penny in my humble opinion or his pennies as he’s just treated me to a new one … brand spanking new Clean, pristine , navy and turquoise .. fuck love my life … also have ( which are essential too ) Paramo Cascada waterproof/wind proof trousers now with these you don’t have to wear anything underneath so again you not like an onion and unable to move …base layer is fine under too if cold I can even get mine over jeans ! Now I am no skinny chick by any means and these are a fab fit with a fat arse like mine !! … lastly by no means least.madmoose.co.uk hats … the most gorgeous hand made bobble hats .. toasty all from http://www.srcunningham.co.uk.. super service , great advice and fab products my salomon boots (from there all those years ago !) have just been used every day for 2 weeks perfect dry feet every day fair play.

On that note I must finish off by saying I apologise for lack of grammar but I write like I am speaking & I apologise for overuse of the “F” word but that’s me ! … I have blogs written about my travels and I hope you enjoy them they jump back and to from now to last few years .. will keep on keeping on 💋❤️… cariad mawr …it’s time for Boot Camp (outdoor)💪🏻👊🏻😫… not been all summer it’s going to be a tough one but it’s like therapy with a group of great gals … wish me luck … x

PHOTO TAKEN ; LOCHDON , ISLE OF MULL

www.srcunningham.co.uk. … JACKET /BOOTS/HAT & BUFF ( need to go and buy new walking pole😂)
www.madmoose.co.uk. HATS HATS & HATS

www.rohan.co.uk SUMMIT TROUSERS really warm fleece lined great fOR my ever changing temp!!